i am a biological weapon

it seems like everyone is getting sick and no one knows why.

someone was the originator of the disease and spread it to everyone.

i don't know who that person is, but i'm pretty sure i spread it to the most people.

shit.

so yesterday i woke up feeling really shitty, and continued to feel worse and worse until i went to bed. it was there that a fever kept me up half the night. i woke up the next morning and my throat was swollen as shit and i couldn't stop coughing. the fever is all but subsided, but i'm really worried.

i have finals next week. having this sickness will not get me out of them.

i think i'm going to spend a few days just sitting around my room.

watching TV.

writing.

eatin' flintstones.

not smoking.

rolling around and saying "unnnnnngh...."

and of course: blogging

that's all i can do.

i really just wanna get better

please cum visit me with some drugs, bacause i have none.

i'll be writhing on the floor in 118.

also: when i sneeze, it hurts.

-Jizzy T

staring

i realized last night that i really don't like most of the things i do.

i was sitting in my common room, eating chips and salsa, and watching Tommy Wiseau's "The Room."

i really love that movie.

but i don't want to sit and watch movies anymore.

there's too much to be done.

there's too many things that i could be doing that i'm not.

if you're lucky enough to be friends with interesting, fun people, don't waste their company watching movies.

especially "The Room."

i've been working on a novella for some time now, and it's always just been in the back of my mind.

i'm going to be writing a lot more now.

i also plan on going home this week, and although he doesn't know it yet, nilla and i will be recording a little EP or something.

i think i've lost sight of the things that really matter to me.

i'm just focusing on cheap thrills.

there is a thrill in becoming very drunk and stumbling around for an hour.

but when it's an organized event, that's fucking pitiful.

if all of the people that get together to drink at uconn stopped, nothing would happen.

humanity has nothing to gain from their behavior, and everything to lose.

i just want to do something that i can be proud of.

so when someone asks me what i did on a friday night, i can tell them something that will make them think.

i've been saying this for a long time now, but i really want to get into photography.

i'm surrounded by a typical college campus, filled with mostly boring people, but i would give a lot to be able to walk around on a sunny day and take their pictures.

i'm joining a club next semester. whatever club is the most absurd, that is what i will join.

-Jizzy T

uconn spring weekend.

this is not a post about spring weekend, it's a post during spring weekend.

my room fucking stinks.

i've been cleaning for about an hour now, and theres no end in sight.

and the room still fucking stinks.

got 2 more weeks of uconn.

then i come home.

i feel like it'll be a relief at first, but i will come to hate it.

i really need some money, though.

and hopefully i will get a job this summer.

ugh.

in other news, i'm going to be really pissed if i get mono from somebody.

that would really fuck up these last two weeks for me.

really.

i don't think i'll be drinking for the rest of the semester.

partly because of finals, partly as a test of self control.

setting goals for yourself is a cheap way to feign motivation

because it doesn't matter whether you do them or not.

all that matters is that you try.

that's an expression that i really hate.

"well, at least you tried..."

that's bullshit. most of the time if you fail at sonething, it really wasn't worth your time anyway.

and what about when you succeed without trying. i mean, shit.

and once again i find myself at the end of a post and having to face the disgusting horror of my bathroom. there's also some bitches that need straightening out. bitch. needs. get. straight. out.

thanks for destroying my campus leefers, i loved it.

-Jizzy T

we got 22 forties for spring weekend

thats right. 22.

law of anal

the more you want to do anal with a person, the less likely they are to do it.

the inverse is also true.

the less you want to do anal with a person, the more likely they are to do it.

i'm not a professor, but i can teach you.

-Jizzy T

this weekend felt like 1999

even though it began on a bad note, this weekend turned out pretty awesome.

friday was a mellow day, and i got to watch Jurassic Park.

and drink some brooklyn summer ale. (fruity and mellow. serve chilled just below room temp.)

brewed from the waters of the hudson.

but, yeah, jeff goldblum too.

saturday was spent with Pabst in hand and Nilla in heart.

and ass.

sunday was a funday. drank very early. 

yelled at people again.

monday was a clever girl. clever girl. i celebrated the most bro holiday on the calendar.

also: watched The Lost World.

4 actor marathonlogy.

Jeff Goldblum

William H. Macy

Paul Giamatti

Bill Murray

pete and i will be marathoning soon.

all the movies they have ever made.

yeah.

i would also like to add that i am reading a bunch more lately, and if you want to recommend (give) me a book, i will appreciate it.

and maybe even read it.

expect maybe a vlog to come soon.

oh, and video games are cool again.

-Jizzy T

two things that made me feel better

finding a story about a korean man who bought a honda ruckus and traveled across the US.

he found people who let him crash at thier place.

when he couldn't, he slept in a tent.

he's pretty rad.

his name is WAN.

i also read the first volume of warren ellis's DOKTOR SLEEPLESS.

i could describe it to you, but you should just buy (or steal) the first volume.

it's kinda like V FOR VENDETTA, but sexier. and more lovecraftian.

warren ellis also writes novels.

CROOKED LITTLE VEIN is good.

there you go, leefies.

there's your inspiration for the week. go get something done.

i gotta go chat up some fine ladies.

tomorrow will be a day of epicness.

club 118 leefers. (are you up to speed?)

-Jizzy T

concerning blogs and friendship

i've been blogging a lot in the past few days.

mostly because i've had things on my mind, and no one really to talk to.

so.

i hide them in ambiguous statements, and put them in my blog.

so there you go.

this is where the subtlety ends.

i found out who my real friends are.

i also found out that some people really just do not have a fucking clue.

i'm not sure if i blame them or not.

we'll get there, leefies.

real friends are people that will help you no matter what.

everyone will agree with this statement. most people don't know what it means.

people try and do "what's best" for someone. 

but then again, what you and i think is best doesn't mean shit.

there is no book on how to be a real friend. there is no protocol on what to do when your friend is in trouble.

some people try and handle this like they handle most of their problems.

...by trying to remain guiltless.

they try and pass the responsibility onto someone, something else.

treat the symptoms. ignore the disease.

i'm dramatizing for the sake of comprehension and amusement.

the point i'm trying to make is, nobody is easy to understand.

the world would be a very boring place if that were true.

but trying to understand that person, by trying to put yourself into their shoes, you understand their feeling better.

s'called empathy, bro.

once you understand how someone feels, you don't have to do anything to help them.

have someone to share your feelings with is the remedy to almost any ailment.

everyone wants to do what's right. that's just the easy way out.

or this is all bullshit. i'll let you decide.

clueless people?

well, i can't say that i haven't been clueless before.

so i guess i won't hold it against them.

but it's just so damn annoying.

so what brings on this pretentious and assuming blog post? i think some leefers probably know.

i'll let the rest use their imagination. if they have any.

my next post will be cheerful. whether i like it or not.

-Jizzy T

my HMO won't cover this

my friend said something very profound to me today.

"every day the future looks better"

that may seem really uplifting, but you know, it might not be true.

pretty much a nerd

DISCLAIMER: this is a post that's going to be about computers.

i just wanted to warn you, because i know that some of you leefers "dun wanna read none a dat nerdy shit."

even though you are all on a computer right now.

so a few days ago i began having some troubles with my computer.

shit was freezing for minutes at a time, and other things didn't work at all.

i was pissed.

i initially thought, "well, i built this computer over 2 years ago, and have never reformatted since then." 

it may have just been accumulated shit that was clogging my tubes.

i reformatted and installed Windows XP Pro x64

that is one unstable fucking OS. my old problems persisted, and it seemed like it was getting worse.

and i had troubles running my old programs on a XP x64 machine.

my next thought: it must be a hardware issue.

my CPU and RAM were never spiking, even during the freezing, so they were out of the question.

my motherboard is old as shit but is a really reliable shit.

also, the mobo would need to be fucked up in a very unique way to still run, but run shitty.

my hard drive was the culprit.

my primary 250 gig drive was real old, and had the OS installed on it both times.

after some backing-up of file, and stress testing, we (my roommate and myself) that the HD was barely limping along. the transfer speeds were nearly non-existent.

installing the OS on my 750 gig HD should solve this problem.

instead of installing the XP Home Edition that i initially had or the XP Pro x64 that i installed later, i decided to upgrade to a completely untested crack of Windows Vista Ultimate x64.

it is as badass as it sounds.

vista gets a bad rap, but alot of the problems have been ironed out by now.

anyway, the crack was amazing and even fooled the windows validation tool, which is contantly being updated on the website. it was great.

the problems ceased, and vista is running better than XP ever was.

i am really excited. this means i will enjoy being on my computer more.

and that means more posts for you, my leefies.

ugh. well that was exhasting to type, so it much have been exhasting to read.

thanks for allowing me to expose my nerdiness. it feels good to have it out in the open.

somebody touched my keyboard. with popcorn-butter fingers.

they will pay.

-Jizzy T

cutted my hair.

pardon the lapse in my blog posts.

my computer's tummy hurt, but i fixed it with knowledge.

on a related note: i really fucking dislike apple's business model.

• make shit thats pretty fucking awesome.
• make the shit cost a fortune.
• make the shit completely incompatable with any other company's products.
  

it pisses me off. i'm a windows user simply because i don't want to worry about "having it for mac." because half the time they don't, and the other half of the time it works shitty. and the apple alternative will cost you. mac users: i admire you. because you are rich, or blissfully ignorant.

or both.

okay, and i also had my hair cut a few days ago.
the haircut was designed by pete.
executed by moosey.
pete calls it "the german dyke."
you can call it "awesome."





anyway.
expect to see this style stick around.
i really like it.

plus pete designed it.
all y'all who be cummin up this weekend.
i can't wait to love you.

<2
-Jizzy T

pete 'n' jizzy

in lieu of easter, i have decided to stay on campus this weekend.

it was a bad choice. nobody is here. 

'cept pete 'n' jizzy. 

and their beer.

i have many guilty pleasures.

sitting on the couch drinking beer all night, and then falling asleep with my nose in a book is one of them. i guess last night wasn't so bad after all.

people call me apathetic all the time. i'm not apathetic.

the things that interest most people just bore me. for example, people ask me if i care about what person "x" is doing to person "y."

usually, i barely know the situation, and even if i did, it just wouldn't affect me.

i do care about other people. but i also know that i will never know everything that is going on in their heads. i can't try to judge their decisions. it's not fair. and futhermore, it will probably never affect me.

people do it to me all the time. they don't know all the facts, and yet, they have a strong opinion on the matter. i'll explain myself later, and the response i usually get is "...oh, well, i didn't know THAT."

well, too fucking bad. don't try to understand people's actions. try and understand people. this argument is so logically in my favor, i sound like an ass for even talking about it. in conclusion, don't involve yourself in trouble. involve yourself in fun. 

like pete. 

he's fun.

and you know what else? the smiths aren't even that good. really, they aren't.

neither is kanye's blog. it's just shit that he wants and i can't afford. and weird pictures. THAT'S IT. check it out if you are as rich and bored as kanye.

what was the point of this post again?

OH!

come hang out with pete and myself. call the JiZZphone.

there.

-Jizzy T

wed-nes-day is the fun-est-day (parody)

if anyone out there in beafyland doesn't know, my desk looks like this.

if you can tell from this shitty drawing, my chair is usually parallel to the edge of my desk.

i sit and turn my body to face the screen and keyboard. i sometimes put my legs up on my bed frame (not pictured.)

recently, my neck has been fucking killing me.

it may be related to the amount of sidesaddle-blogging that i've been doing. (refered to hereafter as slogging.)

i've been doing a lot.//

today was an alright day.

i slept through my alarm, which was really fucking lame, because i missed my only class, but all and all, a good day.

i want to put another blog in the spotlight for a moment.

The Immaculate Chronicles of Supreme Excellence.

the author is a friend. a friend named phil. i met him last semester in my creative writing class.

read this blog.

it has more multimedia and shit than mine. it's better. BETTER.

also: I Heart Tapes (caution! webcomic!)

i don't know how many of you out there, you leefers, read webcomics, but i'm sure it is not enough. they are funny. and they are independent artists trying to make a living by making you laugh. for free. they can eat today if you visit their site. shit, maybe buy a book or something.

another cool thing that i just received (look at me! i'm a blogger! i have things to say! HYPERLINK--HYPERLINK--HYPERLINK) is the entire series "Lone Wolf And Cub." it's a series of Japanese movies about a lordless samurai and his toddler son. they are assassins. lots of good violence here. lots of bad translations too. s'based on a manga. whatever that is.

there's an english "compilation movie" of sorts. it combines the first two movies in this series into one. and completely changes the plot. it's also in english. it's called shogun assassin.

well, this blog has a lot more words than you really need to read. and too many hyperlinks. 

and my neck is starting to hurt again.

masseuse for hire?

-Jizzy T

lost in translation

i don't write "reviews" of things in this blog, but i feel like i need to inform on occasion.

this is one of those occasions.

i have seen this movie before, when it came out.

i didn't think much of it then.

bill murray is one of my favorite actors, and for that, i really liked the movie.

but, recently, i have rewatched this movie. twice.

it began to grow on me.

i rarely watch a movie more than once.

this movie is really just about being alone.

i don't want to say much more than that, but i really think the leefer community will benefit greatly from watching this movie. twice.

scarlett johansson is the cutest girl i have ever seen.

and bill murray is at his perfect "middle-aged man" age.

the soundtrack? my bloody valentine, jesus and mary chain, peaches, and others.

go see this movie.

just like honey

-Jizzy T

yo. hustla.

beer is for the daytime now.

beer and cheese with pete in the common room.

beer and a blog before bed with a cup of tea comin' soon.

also: fuck seth rogan. you gotta lotta ground to make up, rogan. get on it.

also: love you leefers

-Jizzy T

antioxidants

i woke up today and puked.

someone suggested that i "drank some antioxidants."

since when is everyone a fucking doctor, anyway?

i feel better now.

here's something that everyone likes.

lists.

this one is HOTT TRENDZ IN OH-NINE!

1. antioxidants - apparently lots of people are dranking these.

2. wine - better than beer? if not, it's at least as good. and good for you!

3. pants tucked into socks - keep that fucking roundy part of the ankle warm. also: no ticks or poison ivy again. ever.

4. hulu - youtube ripoff with a tv commercial. youtube doesn't have commercials. hulu has family guy creator Seth MacFuckhead as a spokesperson. youtube, you just got served.

5. dancing - people used to like it. then they didn't. then they did some other thing and called it "freakin." now dancing's back. you seen "dancing with the stars?" shit.

6. pickling - it's like BBQ for vegetarians. it takes too long, though.

7. fiscal irresponsibility - with the nation on the brink of collapse, people are dying to spend all their kids college money on jaguars and weed.

8. anarchy - the world is covered in blood AND we're poor. democracy has worn out it's welcome.

9. irony - just like dancing, here, gone, back again. but is it really? is it like, ironic because irony is so dead? i feel like a teenager in the 90's.

10. tinypic - it's better than facebook.

there you have it leefers. the '09 wrapup. before it even fucking happened.

11. leefers - i love them so much.

-Jizzy T

the room

.............................................................

i feel like the fabric of reality is slowing tearing.

that's not a metaphor.

some people are creatures of the night.

-Jizzy T