no future

Snowflakes of dust fell gently. We were just staring at each other. The filtered light revealed everything. Her bottom lip curled, and she wiped her nose. I touched my face nervously. I thought I could hear a flute. Her bags were packed, and the room was naked. The dust traced out every little memory. Each little picture frame. Every letter from her mother. A vase. The towers of books that once looked down upon us. No one moved. Nothing moved. I told her I loved her. I touched my face again. She knew I didn't mean it. I felt ancient. She was so young and ugly. Ugly like the clouds outside. At least, I thought there were clouds.

She told me she wanted things the way they were before. I wanted it to stay like this forever. I wanted to plead with her even though I knew she was leaving. I was an actor in the grand drama and I knew my lines perfectly. She turned around, and I wanted to wink at the audience. I touched her shoulder and whispered one more lie into her ear. Something about how beautiful she looked. She shrugged and took another step. The audience drew hesitant breath. The critics were scribbling something. I cried. Not for her, but for the moment. I knew it would surely be over soon. I would take a bow, drink my champagne, and listen to the applause.

The door slammed and the curtains fell. There would be no second performance. The actors would leave and return home. The would return to their wife, Uncertainty. Her beauty has long since faded. They cannot even remember the day they met, on that long trip away from home. She seemed exotic back then. They can't love her now. She's taken their youth. Now they wait for their moment to become someone else. Something else.

I turned back to my empty apartment. Everything was in harmony. The booze-stained carpet. The crumbling ceiling. I sat in the only chair left, and wiped the sweat off of my face. I would never act again. I wasted my youth pretending I didn't see the stage. I poured a glass of champagne and smiled. For once, I didn't know my lines. I waited for the applause, but it never came.